Your thoughts are what drive your behavior. So, how do you get better at doing those hard things? Something that you find easy and enjoyable another person will find difficult. For example, I enjoy doing laundry. I don’t enjoy cleaning the liter box. I enjoy doing things for people but I don’t enjoy spending time or money on someone that doesn’t appreciate it. So, how do you find a balance so that you can live your most meaningful life?
1. Plan At Least One Difficult Task Every Day
The first thing you do is get better at it. Let’s assume you shy away from anything difficult. Your house is mess, you’re late on your bills and you haven’t called your parents in weeks. I have a rotating “to do” list in my mailbox. I also have a post it note that I keep with me while driving, etc. So, once a day I go through outstanding items. What I find is that my desire to do certain things changes from day to day. My personal goal is to knock out three things off the list per day. The beauty of this is that if your heart isn’t in it on Monday you keep it on the list and relook at it in a couple of days.
2. Practicing Changing Your Self Task From “I Have To” to “I Get To”
I just returned from Mexico and before I went I was completely burned out. I felt like my house was a mess with clutter from my three kids and, if I’m being honest, my own stuff laying around. I don’t like dusting and I remember being in a bathroom just wondering how long it’d been since (other than a housekeeper that comes every other week) someone in my family has dusted it.
In Mexico we were in the Yukatan and it changed my perspective quite a bit. Not all bathrooms had toilet paper, a lid on the toilet or soap. Sometimes, we had to pay to use the bathroom and that bathroom looked like it had never been cleaned. When I returned home I sat in that same bathroom thinking about how beautiful it was because it smelled clean and I was grateful for it. What changed? My mindset. My self talk. My perspective.
Next time you are dreading something, change the words around. Just saying the words makes your perspective and feelings change about the situation. For example, “I get to pay for my kids to go to college. I’m so grateful that I can work hard and do this for them.” This is secretly something I stress out about and have to constantly work on. So, I have to take a step back and remind myself that it’s something that is important for me to do and that I’m happy to do it.
3. Mix The Hard With The Fun
What do you love to do? If you are making food and have 10 minutes while it’s baking use that time to knock out a task. Early in the mornings if I don’t feel like taking my dog on a walk I will listen to podcasts to pass the time. Sometimes I make boring phone calls while driving. There’s nothing I dislike more than going through a phone tree and waiting for 10 minutes because “my call is important” but it’s less frustrating if I do it while I’m already doing something else like driving.
So, get out that to do list and start empowering yourself to do those hard things. The more you do them, the easier they become and I believe in you!
Let’s work together to make the world better!
Jen
